Bison vs Barbie
By Jayk

It was time for a suprise inspection of his base. Everything seemed normal enough as could be expected. The scientist in the lab were testing new techinques to brainwash. The cloning experiments were reaching finalities. Training for Bison's soldiers had even improved. "Twenty push-ups! That's amazings they'll be true warriors in no time." All seemed well until...

"Lord Bison!", a guard yelled from across the training room. Bison turned towards the source of the yell. "What is it now?", inquired Bison. "My Lord, Barbie is in the battle stage area." "Ooo...kaaay. Why?" "I don't know, sir, I didn't ask." "Very well I will deal with it."

While he walked to the battle stage area, 'I wonder which one of my men is so ecchi that they have brought a doll into the base.' As he entered the area he realized what was truely going on. "Hmm...when I heard Barbie was here I thought they were talking about a doll, or at least that it was a joke. Now I see that it really is you Barbie. I didn't know you were a real person." The attractive blond looked up towards Bison in surprise.

"My names not Barbie. It's Eliza.", she replied.

"Eliza?", Bison thought for a moment. "Oh yes! Now I remember. You're the girl involved with that Ken Masters guy." Bison began to grin.

"You must excuse my men. They said you were Barbie. Honest mistake I guess. You know seeing how she's with a Ken and you're with a Ken. Also..." Bison paused looked Eliza up and down. "There's the bone structure."

"Bone structure? What's that supposed to mean?", Eliza asked in retaliation.

"Never mind that. Why are you here?"

"I...don't know?"

"Well, you're here in the battle area, you must be here to challenge me.", Bison reconciled. Eliza only gave a clueless look. "So since Ken is still alive let me guess you want to fight me because I killed your father, it your mother, or both maybe?"

"No, my parents are both still alive."

"Well then was it a sibling?"

"No, I'm an only child."

"Hmm...have I raped you?"

"NO!!!"

"Would you like me to? hehehe", Bison stated under his breath.

"What was that!?", asked Eliza.

"Will get to that later. Are you me?"

"I don't get it. What is that supposed to mean?", she asked confusedely.

"You know...are you a clone of me?"

"That's stupid of course not. You're a guy, at least I think, and I'm a woman. There's no way I could be a clone especialy since we don't look alike."

"What do you think Cammy is?"

"That's sick."

"Eliza!!!", a voice far off sceamed. The person came through a door into the battle area. "Eliza I found you."

"Ken!!!", Eliza called out as she ran to Ken's outstreched arms. "Ken, I'm so glad youre here."

"It's ok now. I've come to save you."

"Save?", Bison inquired.

"Don't play dumb. You had you're men kidnap her. Obviously to get to me so I'd join you.", stated Ken.

"Oh...I see. I guess that explains why she's here then. However, I tire and wish to get back to my inspection of my base."

"Is this another of your tricks to make me let my guard down? I know you're still after Ryu and me. You're tricks won't work."

"You're wrong. I don't want either of you anymore. I've found a better fighter with much more potential."

"Oh yeah, who's that pray tell?"

"Dan Hibiki. I believe you know him. He's got half you're skills with a quarter of the training. Such a strong being melded with my psycho powers will certainly crush any opposition."

"You're mad!"

"Am I? I don't think so. In case you haven't noticed he fights better when he thinks about fighting Sagat. All I have to do is use my power to twist his mind to think everyone that opposes him is Sagat. The more fighters that oppose him the more his power will multiply. It will be magnificent."

"Zero times a hundred is still zero.", stated Ken.

Bison was aggrivated now. "If you insist on pissing on my plans go right ahead. However be prepared to be one of the first to fall. That being said I really do have things to do so why don't you just show yourself out, and take your little Barbie doll with you." Bison turned and walked towards the door.

"I'm not a Barbie doll. My name is Eliza."

Bison stopped and turned around. "Oh, I'm sorry Barbie. I didn't me to call you Barbie, Barbie. It was an honest mistake Barbie. It'll never happen again Barbie. Hehehe." Bison laughed as if he had triumphed in some great feet.

"Hey, don't mess with my fiance like that."

"Oh, Barbie doesn't mind. Do you?"

"If you call me "Barbie" one more time..."

"You'll WHAT, Barbie? Hehehehe Hahahaha" Bison chuckled as he turned to leave.

"That's Bison now I'm gonna..." Ken was unable to finish his threat do to an interruption.

"BASTARD!!!", Eliza screamed at the top of here lungs.

Bison stopped and peaked over his shoulder to the source of the demonic sounding scream as well did Ken. They both were more than surpised by what they saw. Eliza was glowing with a pure white light. Here fists were clinched and here head was lowered. Then she tossed her head back and let her hands open and drop dowm to here waist. She then began to float inch by inch from the ground. At this point Ken has distanced himself from the floating Eliza and is now watching bug eyed. Light came from here eyes and mouth. Bison was watching in total disbeleif. His eyes were bulging out and his jaw had dropped to the floor. Snot dripped from his nose as he stood there stupified. "What the heck is she? Ultimate Destruction Barbie, coming to a toy store near you this holiday season?", quipped Bison.

"YOU DIE NOW!!!", screamed Eliza in her now demonic voice.

"Yipes." Eliza came at Bison so fast it seemed as though she teleported. She grabed by the neck with her right hand. She drew back her left hand and her nails extended. She yelled as she brought her hand to hit Bison. After the initial hit an extreme light was created bloughting all vision. (Very Shun Goku Satu-ish) Girlish screams were the only thing that could be heard coupled with the sound of punishing attacks. When the light cleared Eliza stood over Bison's broken and a hair dryer crossed with a hair curler flashed in the back ground. Ken stood stupified as Eliza walked over to him. "Come on honey, lets go."

"Su-sure. Whatever you say.", Ken stammered.

"Oh, I was thinking maybe we should get married in May?", Eliza was said. She seemed to act as if nothing had happened.

"Maybe,...I...went to far?", muttered the blugened Bison.

Today I guess Bison learned not to piss off Bar-, uh, I mean Eliza.